|
ELOISA AMEZCUA from THE GOD POEMS —after Olena Kalytiak Davis i didn’t tell anyone about the time god and i had a threesome with a stranger after a wedding because it never happened but why did i open my big mouth about the broken door martinis in the city the wound that was god’s throat the desert flowering in april shades of new green how we tumbled and stumbled and tumbled along the canals to forget how i tumbled into god’s wound mistaken for my own hoped for once to finally love but couldn’t o so girlish and so rotten ruined everything i was resurrected into another man’s puppetslut did i mention that my first i love you was taken by a boy that slapped me across the face and how much later i threw i love yous and still later forever and evers away without hesitation remember the party the porch it was humid god drunk threw my phone into the street screen cracked glass glittered my hand and god’s friend looked into me said god would only hurt me in the end and no one knew it then but i was already vile wicked and expired when will i learn to keep quiet for god’s sake i have probably said too much on the topic of being both the betrayer and the betrayed i have disposed of my own body gotten down on my knees in prayer prayed o i have begged go ahead take my stupid soul i have deceived every one and thing i have ever worshiped worship worn warned wanted want got |